you need help. Reaching out and making yourself vulnerable to others isn’t something that comes easily to anyone, especially when mental health conditions like depression cloud your mind and make everything seem hopeless.
There is a certain social stigma that surrounds going to therapy, and you may view it as a sign of weakness or a step backwards, but the truth is it takes an incredible amount of inner strength and courage to reach out when you feel overwhelmed. If you’re considering therapy, you should already be incredibly proud of yourself for recognising your own struggles and taking the massive first step towards a healthier mind.
Talking therapies are often broad in the spectrum of conditions or issues that they can help you deal with — but maybe you’re looking for more practical help than emotional support, or something you can fit into your packed schedule. Here’s a rundown of 6 different kinds of talking therapies to help you in your search.
1.Counselling
Counselling, potentially the most widely-known form of talking therapy, involves talking in confidence to a counsellor who will help you work through the particular difficulties you may be dealing with. Talking to a 3rd party that isn’t directly involved in your life or issues can be refreshing and lets you speak freely, safe in the knowledge that you are in an environment free from judgement.
Counselling is available through the NHS, and can be accessed without a referral from your GP. This form of therapy is recommended for people struggling with a particular issue or crisis without the existence of any underlying mental health conditions and has been observed to be an effective treatment of ongoing problems such as bereavement and drug addiction. However, there is still strong evidence for the effectiveness of counselling in the management of common mental disorders such as anxiety and depression.
For most people, counselling is a low-intensity entry point to talking therapies in general. It is non-directive and promotes self-understanding through listening, empathy, and encouragement. You may be offered a single session, or a course of sessions spanning weeks or months. It can take a number of sessions before you begin to notice progress, but just having the support of a therapist can quickly make you feel better equipped to deal with your problems. Refer yourself for counselling and take that all-important first step towards receiving the support you need.
2. Cognitive-Behavioural Therapy
Oftentimes, it is the way we think about our problems that causes the most distress. For example, if you truly believe yourself to be a socially awkward person, the chances are that you will behave more awkwardly in social scenarios, reaffirming your original belief — which in turn will lead to even more socially awkward behaviour. The problem here is not that you are socially awkward — it is that you believe you are socially awkward. You take these negative schemas and frameworks of yourself with you in everything you do, and it is your negative patterns of thought that lead to negative feelings — subsequently creating negative behaviours, which provoke even stronger negative thoughts and start the cycle all over again.
This negative thought-feeling-behaviour cycle forms the basis of the theory behind cognitive-behavioural therapy (CBT). CBT is a goal-oriented talking therapy that aims to help explore and challenge your negative patterns of thought, changing the way you think about yourself or your life through the teachings of practical and helpful techniques, which can, in turn, enact a positive change in the way you feel and behave.
CBT sessions are usually clearly structured. Unlike counselling, the therapist will take the reins and direct the conversation, focusing on your current problems and helping you explore practical solutions that work for you. CBT has been shown to effectively treat a wide range of mental disorders including insomnia and anxiety, as well as physical issues such as the management of chronic pain.
One course of CBT is usually anywhere between 12 and 20 hour-long sessions and is recommended for those seeking a talk therapy that works towards tangible solutions with clear, achievable goals. Your therapist may well set you tasks to carry out between your sessions, though, so don’t seek this one out if you’re not willing to do your homework!
3. Psychodynamic Therapy
Acting as more of a ‘deep dive’ into your conscious and unconscious mind, psychodynamic therapy aims to explore your personality and early life experiences to help you understand how they have shaped your current way of thinking. While CBT is more of a problem-based therapy aiming to reduce or eliminate symptoms of negative mental health states, psychodynamic therapy utilises more of a holistic focus on the client’s perspective in order to address the root of your problems through a complete exploration of your deep-seated fears, urges and desires.
Courses of this therapy typically span over several months or even years, as you work closely with your therapist to gain a complete understanding of your thoughts, feelings, behaviours, relationships, dreams, and fantasies; ultimately, it is designed to aid you in coming to fully know yourself and your inner workings.
Psychodynamic therapy creates positive long-term change in its clients, who tend to continue to improve long after their course has ended through an increased level of self-knowledge. This form of therapy has also been found to have powerful effects in the treatment of more severe mental health issues such as that of personality disorder — though it can still be used to address a wide range of common mental health disorders and symptoms.
The psychodynamic approach is best suited to those interested in total self-exploration. However, this form of therapy will potentially involve dredging up early childhood experiences that may bring you some discomfort — so make sure you are surrounded by people you love and be willing to devote a lot of time and energy into this therapy before you tackle the large undertaking of developing a total understanding of yourself.
4. Eye Movement Desensitisation and Reprocessing
After going through a significant negative event (e.g. the loss of a close loved one), the associated emotional pain and trauma can remain in us for several years before the healing process even begins. When we experience mental trauma that is just too much for us to handle, the brain attempts to completely block it out in an attempt to recover itself. However, over time, our emotional wounds begin to fester if they haven’t been adequately processed, and psychological trauma manifests itself in harmful symptoms such as dissociation, sleep disorders, night terrors, and depression.
Eye Movement Desensitisation and Reprocessing (EMDR) is a form of psychotherapy that utilises eye movements to process disturbing or painful events in your life and transform them on an emotional level. The process involves you sitting with your therapist and talking through your difficult memories as you track their finger or some other visual stimulus with your eyes as it moves back and forth across your visual field. Psychotherapist Dr. Arielle Schwartz explains that, through the combination of rapid eye movements and recalling your distressing memories, EMDR therapy alters your “maladaptive neural networks by connecting the traumatic memory with new information”.
Multiple studies have found EMDR therapy to produce powerful positive changes in sufferers of PTSD, who claim that the process has enabled them to think differently of their trauma or let go of it completely — viewing themselves as a survivor instead of a sufferer. Similar to psychodynamic therapy, EMDR will involve recalling particularly difficult memories that can bring significant distress, so it is important to have a strong support network around you before you begin — but this therapy is highly recommended for people experiencing intrusive thoughts and struggling to let go of painful events from their past.
5. Relationship or Family Counselling
Oftentimes when we are struggling with something in our personal lives, it is our interpersonal relationships that suffer the most. Poor or strained relationships with your loved ones can cause depression — which acts to strain our relationships even further. Going to family or relationship counselling is an effective way of facilitating open and healthy communication between you and your loved ones over the particular issues you are facing.
In family counselling, a therapist works with you and your family to reduce distress and conflict by acting as a mediator, promoting improved systems of interaction and a greater understanding of the problems you or some of your family members may be facing. Sessions are typically between 45 minutes to an hour and take place several weeks apart. This therapy is particularly effective at helping families deal with issues such as child behavioural problems and mental illness, as well as domestic violence and alcohol or substance abuse. Family counselling is ideal for those who feel that relationships within their family have become strained, communication needs to be worked on, or that multiple family members are sharing a common struggle or issue. This therapy is at its most effective when all involved parties show a willingness to learn and communicate, though, so if your family is particularly old-fashioned, or would struggle to accept this idea, then one of the alternative talking therapies outlined above may be more suitable for you.
In relationship counselling, both partners talk in confidence to a counsellor or therapist to explore what they feel has gone wrong in their relationship and how it should be addressed or changed. It is similar to family therapy in that the counsellor will act as your mediator, encouraging openness and honesty and helping you both to better understand each other’s needs. Relationship counselling is effective in helping couples deal with specific issues such as infertility and infidelity, or just generally promoting healthier communication and greater relationship satisfaction in both partners — boasting a 75% effectiveness rate according to the American Psychological Association. Ideally, both partners would attend relationship counselling sessions, but it is still possible to achieve the same results if it is only you attending. If you feel you and your partner could benefit from relationship counselling, open a dialogue with your spouse about it — and remember this isn’t the first step in the breakdown of your relationship, but the first step towards healthier and happier lives together.
6. Online or Over the Phone Therapies
It’s quite a painful irony that those of us with the least free time are often the ones who could benefit most from taking the time to speak to a mental health professional. For those of you who lead particularly busy working lives with jam-packed schedules, you’ll be pleased to learn that there are a multitude of talking therapies available to you over the phone or online, as well as a wealth of mental health helplines, online resources and apps you could use for guided self-help.
Naturally, you might have some doubts about how effective therapy can actually be when it’s done through a screen instead of face-to-face. However, you may be surprised to find out that multiple studies have deemed online or over-the-phone therapies to be a viable alternative to face-to-face treatment, with some studies finding no difference at all in efficacy between the two. Non-face-to-face therapies have been shown to achieve positive results in smoking cessation, chronic pain management, and reducing symptoms of anxiety and depression.
There’s no reason to work yourself into the ground — you should always make time for yourself. Start treating yourself with the same care with which you treat others and get a GP referral (or refer yourself) for an online or over-the-phone therapy, and work some self-care into your busy schedule.
Ready to Talk it Out?
There are several different talking therapies out there, each with their own names, methods, and techniques — but don’t let all the jargon discourage you. Each therapist will have slightly different approaches and styles, but they will always tailor them to you and the specific issues or conditions you are struggling with.
The important thing to keep in mind here is that while a therapist can help and advise you, they do require cooperation and a willingness to learn on your part. In order to attain the most powerful positive changes from a talking therapy, you need to be able to commit yourself to the process. So find the talking therapy that best matches your needs, and make the commitment to start working on enriching yourself and your life, and taking steps towards becoming the person you want to be.
