Have you found your purpose in life? No? Yeah, me neither, and to be quite honest, I’ve had enough of looking for it. It clearly doesn’t want to be found, and I’m ready to make my peace with that. If you’re just as tired as me, you’re in luck; I’m about to convince you that you don’t even need a purpose to be happy in life. Controversial, I know, but bear with me! I might just blow your mind.
Why can’t I find my ‘purpose’?
We’re made to feel like finding a purpose is the be all and end all, like we will never find happiness if we don’t find one sole reason for living. Well, I just don’t buy it. I’ve spent countless hours, days, weeks agonising over what my purpose could be. Everyone else seems to have one, so I must too! But I’m not too sure any more.
Can we really boil down our whole existence into a single ‘why’? And should we have to? It may be all well and good for some; I know people who have known their purpose since they were kids, and I’m happy for them! But we should know by now that one size does not fit all.
For a fair, if underrepresented, amount of us, finding a purpose is hard, bordering on impossible. I mean, if finding my purpose is supposed to make me happy, why is it so stressful? And then if you don’t manage to figure it out, it can feel like a failure. But what have you really failed at?
What even is a ‘purpose’?
This may be a controversial view, but I think that the whole concept of a ‘purpose’ is a social construct. The purpose of early man was just to survive, yet now we are expected to present a thesis statement of how we intend to live our whole lives? Media has definitely contributed to this; after all, stories without meaning aren’t as compelling, right?
But we are not stories. We’re allowed to be incomplete and chaotic and maybe a little boring sometimes. It’s all part of life! I think that it is possible to live a happy, fulfilling life even if you never find a purpose; a purpose may be a nice thing to have, but it’s not a necessity.
Living without a ‘purpose’
So how, then, does one find happiness without a purpose? I don’t think the answer is a big secret; quite the opposite actually. The answer is so simple that a lot of people overlook it. You’ll surely experience many happy moments if you follow your curiosities and find joy in the little things.
The little moments that make up life are everything, as it’s here that you will find true happiness; think of how you feel when you see your loved ones smile, when you hug your kids, when your pet wags its tail at you. That is happiness; I mean, what else could it be? You don’t need to find some grand purpose to feel this happiness, you just do. And following your curiosities will lead you to experiencing new things that could bring you even more of these happy little moments.
Redefining ‘purpose’
After all, it’s not the concept of ‘purpose’ that brings us happiness, but the little actions that we take to live up to this purpose. Take the focus off the purpose itself and just put the effort into being a good person who does things that make you and those important to you proud; you really can’t go wrong this way.
If the idea of a ‘purpose’ is still appealing to you but you’re not sure exactly what your purpose could be, why not change your perspective. Who says you only have to have one purpose? Why not give yourself a bunch of little ones? In the end, having a purpose is supposed to make you happy, so make sure that it does. And if you’ve decided that you can live a good life without one, welcome to the club!
Written by Adena Dewar
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