If we go by statistics, anyone reading this article probably has low self-confidence, since around 85% of the world’s population is affected by low self-confidence. But even with this issue affecting an unfortunate majority of us, scientists have yet to invent a quick fix.
Low self-confidence can have devastating effects on our lives — even prioritising ourselves, and our needs can be difficult. We can end up vulnerable to being used or taken advantage of. Even trivial things such as making decisions can feel like a near-impossible task when you have low self-confidence.
Your work life, personal life, and social life can all be influenced by low self-confidence. For instance, you may find yourself overworking to try and prove your worth, or accepting mistreatment from friends and partners because you feel that you don’t deserve better. As with any problem, finding its cause is the first step to finding a solution. So, if you have low self-confidence and want to change that, look inwards in order to find the reason that your self-confidence is so low. There may not be just one reason, but a combination.
- Failure or rejection
Believe it or not, every single person you know will have experienced failure or rejection at least once in their life. So, every single one of us knows how it feels to fall short of a goal or to not feel good enough after a rejection. It can reduce the self-confidence of even the most confident people.
When it happens repeatedly, when we can’t seem to succeed and when we get turned down time and time again, it is easy to let these blows chip away at our self-confidence. None of us are immune to outside influence; when we are rejected, we are told that we are not good enough, and this feeling of inadequacy is the crux of low self-confidence.
While it is often easier said than done, in these situations, we need to try and recognise our successes, not just our failures, because we are all so much more than our lowest points. Think about what you’re good at; it can be something as simple as making your friends laugh. And remember that your failures do not define you. There is always the opportunity to improve, and learning from your failures and rejections is a way to do this.
2. Life Experiences
One of the biggest contributors to low self-confidence is our past experiences, usually those of the negative variety. People who have been bullied or abused can often experience low self-confidence; even if the bullying or abuse happened in childhood, the effects could last into adulthood. Events such as the end of a relationship or job can also cause a decline in self-confidence.
It is important to be kind to yourself and try not to be your own worst enemy. Traumatic experiences can cause people to adopt the voices of their critics and become self-deprecating. Imagine it were a friend in the same situation that you are in; how would you comfort them? Try to treat yourself with the same care.
Similarly, it can boost self-confidence to surround yourself with people who support and appreciate you, because while the best confidence comes from within, a little outside influence can really help to get you on the right track. You should have friends who compliment you, and when they do, believe them!
3. Social media
This one may be a misnomer; it’s not actually social media that is contributing to our collective low self-confidence, but the fact that it allows us to compare ourselves to others so easily. Comparison itself is not always a bad thing. In fact, it can sometimes be motivating and push us to make positive changes in our lives to become more like those we compare ourselves to. However, thanks to social media, we are more exposed to the lifestyles of the rich and famous, and we compare our lives to theirs. But, our inability to emulate these lifestyles can lead to a drop in self-confidence.
Some things are better consumed in moderation, and like alcohol, social media is one of them. If every time you scroll through social media, you find yourself feeling unhappy or dissatisfied with yourself, it may be time to take a break.
4. Mental health difficulties
While low self-confidence isn’t a mental health difficulty in of itself, the two are often closely linked. In some cases, prolonged low self-confidence can contribute to mental health problems such as depression and anxiety. Or, low self-confidence can be a side effect of mental health problems like these or others. It doesn’t help that there is a stigma attached to mental health issues, as this means that a diagnosis may have a further negative effect on your self-esteem.
When the source of your low self-confidence is a mental health issue, professional help could be necessary for restoring your self-esteem. WellBe offers counselling that can be incredibly useful in raising your confidence. Reach out to your coordinator or visit our site to book a session! Consider speaking with your GP too if you have worries about your mental health and find it affecting your daily life.
Written by Adena Dewar
WellBe is spearheading the way to a brighter future for corporate wellness. Our innovative portal is scientifically designed and tailored to each individual employee to improve their wellbeing. We specialise in a range of services from coaching and therapists, to meditation and reading materials. Our aim is to reduce workplace stress that costs UK businesses £42 billion per year. Get in touch with us by visiting our site wellbe.global for more information.
